Hindi dapat

Hindi ako dapat ganito.

falter
red underline
edit
delete

Hindi nako magiging ganito.


KAYA KO BA TO?


===

From the Dream Moods website. Link HERE

Stab
To dream that you have been stabbed, signifies your struggle with power. You are experiencing feelings of inadequacy and defensiveness. Alternatively, the dream suggests that you are feeling betrayed as reflected by the popular phrase, "being stabbed in the back".

To dream that you stab someone, indicates your fear of betrayal and your untrusting nature. You are being overly defensive.

Gabi gabi na lang...

Gabi gabi ko na lang karamay ang The Script.
Okay lang naman... Buti nga yun eh.
Para wala nang masasamang panaginip.

Gusto ko lang sana ng matinong tulog,
mahirap ba yun?

KAMI AY...

Napagalitan ng bonggang-bongga.... ng tatlong tao.

HAAAAY. Kami ang may kasalanan.
Siguro hindi maganda na apat kami.

Haaaaaaaay.
BREATHE IN, BREATHE OUT.

'Wag mong hayaan na maulit yung mga panaginip mo.
So far, pangatlong panaginip na yung kagabi.

Pinakanakakatakot parin yung pangalawa.
Pero, wala, pare-pareho parin silang lahat ng epekto sa'kin - takot.

Yung pangatlong panaginip, yung kagabi, may "vision" nang kasama nung nagising ako. At hindi ata maganda yun, kasi ibig sabihin lumalala na siya.

Natatakot nako talaga.
Seryosong problema na 'tong mga panaginip na 'to.

HW Day

Nalulungkot ako for Lil :'(

Doubts

ANG DAMING ADVICE NG MUNDO,


PWEDENG MAMATAY NALANG?

One Not-So-Free Day

I need to use this day WISELY. There are SO MANY THINGS on my plate. I need the greatest plan in the world to get through this.. and that "greatest plan" includes...

LISTENING TO MY ULTIMATE FAVORITE 90'S POP ICONS!.
Ohyeah.

A1, Backstreet Boys, Destiny's Child,
Westlife, Nsync, Britney Spears,
Hanson, Jlo, Blue.

AHAHA. I extremely missed these guys.

"Sometimes I run, sometimes I hide, sometimes I'm scared of you, but all I really want is to hold you tight, treat you right, be with you day and night, all I realy need is time...""

CLASSIC BRITNEY FOR THE WIN!

===

"Double hat"

TYPE ARD THING
DIVIDE ALUMNI
TEXT TEXT
LIL
CLM
CONTINUE BATCH GP
SVC PPS
JOMR
ARD
FIX SCHED
DISCUSS NEW MEMBERS
CONCRETE PLAN FOR ........
CONSTI

I'm pretty busy, you know.
I'm busy and I'm super pretty.
HAHA.

===

Kyla wants freedom.

Random.

Nabalitaan ko nasa banda ka na raw...
Banda rito sa puso ko.


===

GANDA NI REGINE TODAY SA PARTY PILIPINAS.
NAPAPA-OHEMGEE NALANG AKO.
SEXY! WHOO!

In other news..
SINONG WORRIED?
AKO!

Haay. Need to edit stuff.
And need to watch Batch '81: AKO.
*panic*


===

The simplest things count the most.

Good day.

Word for the day: Jerjer :))
SUPAH FUNNEH!



Stayed at KFC for 5 hours.
5:30pm - 10:30pm.

It was actually fun.
What happened really was that we didn't realize that time passed us by.
No kidding! We were just laughing our heads off
...while planning and being serious at the side.
Haha.

Buhay HOPIAng Ilegal

NAKATULOG AKO. SINONG TANGA ANG MAKAKATULOG SA GANITONG PANAHON HA?!

HAAAAAY. Maaga kami bukas, 7am agad. :|
Buti nalang nalusutan ko na ang mga magulang ko. Sabi ko may leadership training thing sa UP Diliman. Had to do it. Kasi.. kasi.. kasi.. Hindi naman talaga nila ako papayagan sa totoo kong gagawin. Buhay HOPIAng ilegal.

At dahil HOPIAng ilegal nga, kelangan laging mahaba yung suot kong shorts, at 'pag natutulog, kailangan meron akong kumot.

Mahirap maging ilegal na HOPIAgirl kasi madami-daming kasinungalingan ang kailangan mong gawin para lang magawa mo ng maayos ang mga HOPIA stuff mo. HAAAAY.

ANYWAYS, nakausap ko si Gnle kahapon ng umaga (mgaaaaa 4am-5am ata yun), at mukhang okay naman siya. Sembreak na raw nila. Haha. Ewan ko ba, natripan ko lang mag-GM nun sa mga taong tingin ko ay gising pa ng oras na yun. Ayoko kasing makatulog dahil nakakahiya sa Chowking, at ayokong iwang gising magisa si Andy. Eh nagkataong gising pa si Gnle, nagbabasa ng libro. Typical Gnle. Haha.

Gusto kong bumili nung The L Word book ni Jennifer Beals. Kaso wala pa ata nun dito sa Pinas. Amps naman.

Teka, naiihi ako.

Sa sobrang desperado ko, ginamit ko na ang ipod ng kapatid ko (na ipod ko rin naman dati, kasi binigay ko lang yun sa kanya). Nakakatuwa kasi andun pa sa ipod niya yung mga ultimate favorite Regine songs ko - Tanging Mahal at Sabihin Mo Lang ♥. Ang sarap pakinggan, as usual. Sabi ko nga diba, siya ang natatanging "constant" sa buhay ko.. Ang saya pa kasi ikakasal na siya sa December 22, 2010 sa Punta Fuego. At mapapanood ko ang kasal na yun sa GMA sa December 26, 2010. Yey.

"Ipagpapalit ko ang mundo, sabihin mo lang..."




ANYWAYS.
GOT TO GO.
NEED TO READ STUFF,
MEMORIZE,
INTERNALIZE,
PREPARE.

STIR.

STARTS TODAY.
Haay. You won't believe what happened to us the whole day yesterday until this morning... Haaaaaay. Will write all the details in my diary.

For now, I need to sleep so badly.

Night. Or morning.
I have no more sense of time.


I love rainbows.

A Thing for Rainbows

For some reason, I've been saving all these rainbow-themed pictures since last night. I'm guessing it's because of the "wear purple today" thing.. And following that, I think the whole "LGBT = rainbows" thing caught me. Gay pride. Haha.

But it doesn't matter, the point is I'm loving rainbows right now and I want one rainbow picture per post STARTING TODAY! Yey.



Thank God for Tumblr. That's where I get all these amazing rainbow pictures! Teehee.

10/20/10: Purple Day

...So I'm wearing purple tomorrow.

Why?

Here's why:

"It's been decided! On October 20th, 2010, we will wear purple in honor of the LGBT youth who have committed suicide in recent weeks/months due to homophobic abuse in their homes and schools.



PURPLE represents Spirit on the LGBTQ flag and that's exactly what we'd like all of you to have with you: spirit. Please know that times will get better and that you will meet people who will love you and respect you for who you are, no matter your sexuality.

Please wear purple on October 20th. Tell your family, friends, co-workers, neighbors and schools.

RIP
Tyler Clementi, Seth Walsh, Justin Aaberg, Raymond Chase, Asher Brown, Cody J. Barker, Harrison Chase Brown, Caleb Nolt, Billy Lucas, Jeanine Blanchette, and Chantal Dube.

Spread The Message. It is important that all this hate be stopped"

Got this from HERE

Mini Joys, Mini Sads.

This is merely a list of my mini joys and mini sads (obviously).

"MINI", why?

'Tis not because they aren't important, because they are, but because I'm lazy to write the tads and bits about each of 'em. :) Hihi.

Mini Joys:
The L Word Season 5 Download
The Script
Mama Lil's texts
Moolah
"Naniniwala siya sa'yo"
2 down, 1 more to go
Walk on by
In the sun
Kape sessions
Semender
Tibette
That's so Raven
Fruits by my bed
"You can break everything down to chemicals, but you can't explain a love like ours..."

Mini Sads:
2 exams tomorrow
Kape sessions
Regine fandom backlogs
Not a word from Elyse... ASAN KA NA BA?
Parents
2 down, 1 more to go


It is a good sign that my Mini Joys outnumber my Mini Sads.
It only means that I'm an OPTIMIST PRIME!

AND...

From The L Word. Haha.

Tina: I have a friend in England and her daughter calls it Frontbottom.
Alice: I had a girlfriend once and she called it her Pretty Pink Pearl, PPP.
Carmen: Hmm, not to be confused with her PeePee.
Bette: You know what’s really lovely? Yoni. It’s Sanskrit.
Alice: No, no, I like, like, a non-Sanskrit trashy thing, like Tongue-trap.
Carmen: Yeah, or a, bald man in a boat.
Shane: Breakfast of Champions.
Tina: Munch-box.
Bette: Weewee.
Carmen: Ha-ha.
Alice: Hoo-hoo.
Bette: Mimi.
Shane: Fuckhole. What else?
Alice: Calcunta.

(Kit sits down.)

Carmen: Hey Kit. What’s wrong?
Kit: I just found out I’ve got menopause.
Bette: It’s okay, no more periods!
Alice: Yeah, you don’t have to take Carrie to the prom anymore!
Bette: No more mood-swings, eventually.
Tina: No more tampons or pads.
Carmen: No more midol, or excedrin, or tylenol, or any of that stuff!
Kit: But once the monkey goes south, that’s the end of it!
Bette: No Kit that’s not true. There are a lot of menopausal women who are very sexually active!
Shane: Yeah it’s true, you can still get it on!
Carmen: You are still gonna be doing the hanky panky til the cows come home!
Alice: Yeah, get yourself a little hot beef injection tonight and feel better.
Bette: You could dip the chip.
Tina: Bang the box.
Carmen: Sweep the chimney.
Shane: Ah, you could stretch that leather.
Tina: Fuck the uglies.
Carmen: Dip’n’dive.
Bette: Shake the sheets.
Alice: Oh, crack a nut.
Bette: Get some skank on the hang-low.
Alice: Ride the baloney pony.
Kit: Give that dog a bone.
All: There ya go! Yeah!
Bette: Shut the oyster, baby.
Carmen: Um, um, put some beef in yo taco.
Shane: Ride that beef bus to tuna town.
Carmen: That was so sexy, I’m so glad you said that.
Kit: I got one. The lips between the hips.
Shane: Furry monkey.
Carmen: Smurf crease.
Tina: Bearded oyster.
Alice: Bikini biscuit.
Carmen: Cooter.
Shane: And uh, Cherry pie.
Alice: Cat flaps.
Shane: What about Cha cha?
Carmen: Hairy goblet.
Alice: Clown’s pocket?
Bette: The grand canyon.
Kit: Here’s another one, fish taco.
Shane: Oh I got a good one, cream collector.
Carmen: Goodie bag.
Kit: How bout this one? Box of assorted creams.
Shane: Honeypot.
Alice: Dugout.
Carmen: Love mitten.
Shane: Mermaids purse.
Alice: Skeeky. Skeezy.
Shane: Oh I got one, the pink velvet sausage wallet. That’s attractive.
Carmen: Noni.
Alice: Ham wallet.
Bette: Coochie.
Alice: Sweet-spot.
Shane: Power slot.
Kit: Ok, I got another one. Foo-foo valve.
Carmen: Pork shutters.
Kit: Bermuda triangle.
Tina: Crabhole.
Alice: Squeegie?
Carmen: Vertical smile.
Shane: The vessel tube.
Carmen: Monkey’s chin.
Alice: Chewbacca.
Shane: What about panty hamster?
Tina: Roast beef sandwich.
Kit: Camel toe! Oh, that’s so generic

In The Sun

I picture you in the sun wandering what went wrong
you've fallen down on your knees asking for sympathy
and being caught in between all you wish for and all you see
and trying to find anything you can feel that you can believe in
may God's love be with you, always

I know i would apologize if i could see your eyes
cause when you show me myself you know i became someone else
but i was caught in between all you wish for and all you need
i picture you fast asleep a night that comes you can keep away
may God's love be with you, always

Cause if i find, if i find my way how much will i find
if i find, if i find my way how much will i find, you, you, i find you, you

I don't know anymore what its for i'm not even sure
if there is anyone who is in the sun will you help me to understand
cause i've been caught in between all i wish for and all i need
oh maybe i'm not even sure what it's for anymore than me
may God's love be with you, always


===




SOBRANG TAWANG-TAWA AKO DITO, BATCH.
FUNNY PIC OF THE CENTURY!

HAHA!

Walk On By

If you see me walking down the street
And I start to cry each time we meet
Walk on by, walk on by

Make believe
that you don't see the tears
Just let me grieve
in private 'cause each time I see you
I break down and cry
And walk on by (don't stop)
And walk on by (don't stop)
And walk on by

I just can't get over losing you
And so if I seem broken and blue
Walk on by, walk on by

Foolish pride
Is all that I have left
So let me hide
The tears and the sadness you gave me
When you said goodbye
Walk on by
and walk on by
and walk by (don't stop)

Kelangan ko lang masabi

...na sobra sobra na ang pagmamahal ko para sa'yo.

At dahil sobra na,
nahihiya tuloy ako sa'yo.




PS: Oo, nagonline lang ako para sabihin yun.

I WILL.

STAND ON MY OWN TWO FEET.

I can.

Idol. Idol ko talaga si Lil kahit anong mangyari..

Don't make decisions when you're angry,
don't make promises when you're happy.

Hindi na yun magbabago sa haba ng panahon.

Ayokong maging dahilan 'to ng pagsuko o pagkawala ng loob.
I'm taking it as a challenge..

Thursday update.

Parang Twitter lang ah.. :))

Anyways. I still haven't received any replies from my dear Mama Lil. Haaay. What to do? Kagabi ko pa siya tinext. I pray that we're still on for this afternoon. And because I believe in my Mama Lil's power, I shall wait. Patience is indeed a virtue..

On the other hand, my scheduled "date" with Clm has been moved to Monday afternoon. She's just not Clm, she's now the Ms. Busy Bee Clm. Hihi. :)) Kaya namove kami to Monday..

Haaay. Exams on Monday and Tuesday.
But it's okay, I think I can manage.. I hope I can manage.

I'm still anxious about the things we discussed during our Kape session last night. Questions have to be answered and answered wisely at that. Whoooooooo *huge huge sigh* I can do this not because I know I can, but because I sincerely WANT to do this. I want this for my Hopiababes' future.

I want this, I know.

Hopia day with Cain pogi.

Here's the story of my (probably) unforgettable Hopia day :)

As you may have read, I was staying in Coffeebean awhile ago "editing" my paperworks. But that didn't actually happen. Clm called and informed me that Erc is just in the PGH and he's planning on visiting us, the residents, in the tambayan. Panic came first when she told me of Erc's arrival, but then eventually, I packed my things and went to the tambayan.

I got there and sat by my lonesome for about 30 minutes until PC came. We talked for a bit, but he had to go back to his class because he just slipped out from the said class to meet Erc. Unfortunately, even I'm not sure what time he's arriving. Later on, my nursing babes showed up! Apparently their exam was already done and they came right down the tambayan to meet Erc, who got to the tambayan just a few minutes after my nursing babes arrived.

First impression: POGI, pwede pakiss? Haha! Serously. He had this Piolo slash Jericho vibe.. raw, rugged yet tamed, sweet and such a gentleman! Waaah! His voice, his voice! It melts me :)

So after I got over his majestic aura, I snapped back to reality and asked/interviewed him about his life in the priesthood way. OH YES! Sadly for us, he's currently taking his "priesthood education" and in a few years, he'll be a full-pledged priest. Sadneeeeessss :'( How come all the nice and perfect guys end up either being gay or in Erc's case, on their way to priesthood. Haay. Atleast we got to talk to him and I had the chance to learn more about the seminary. Yey!

Btw, sometime in the middle of Erc's visit, Bianx and Kev arrived. And as usual, bothered na naman ako kay Bianx. Haay. :'s

When he left, Vna, Andy and I met with Claud at Rob. We had Jolibee for dinner and our third Kape session commenced after our plates have been cleared off. Haha. The session was, as usual, scary and happy at the same time... Haaay.

Kabado na tuloy ako para sa bukas.

But I need to get over this fear and straighten my thoughts out.

Bye.


PS: Hopia days are the best.

At Coffeebean.

WAAAW. It's been so long since I last went to and abused a coffee shop. Haha. Ang kapal ko nga eh.. I didn't even buy a drink. I used my usual tactic - I sat on a table that already has a "leftover" drink. And pretended like that "leftover" drink was my drink. OHYEAH. Haha.

Now, I don't have to buy anything from Coffeebean. I don't need to purchase a drink to serve as my "ticket" for me to use their electricity and wi-fi. Hihi. Para-paraan lang 'to, pare!

I'm staying here 'til Claud, Vna and Andy finish their own buzinezzez before we officially start our Kape session for today.

Right now, I'm just editing and revising my paperworks.
I'm also waiting for Bianx and Kevn, they said they'd stop by here before they both go home and study for their exam tomorrow.

Speaking of exams, the 95 Final exam I took awhile ago was relatively easy. They were all right. The exam was a compilation of parts of past exams. Wenk. My next 2 exams are scheduled for next week (Monday and Tuesday). So, for now, I can breathe a for a while..

BYE NOW. :D
I shall do some of my paperworks.


===

Girl: May wi-fi po kayo dito?
Cashier person: Ay wala fo, affle fie lang.

BENTA.

Solita Monsod for President.

SERIOUSLY.

THIS WOMAN IS A GENIUS.



I've been given the blessed opportunity to see her personally back in summer. She was one of our guest speakers in the St. Paul's leadership training thing I helped facilitate this 2010 :)

She really is one heck of a woman.
Pwede akin na lang brains niya?

Calm AFTER the Storm.

Even though I know I messed up my two exams today, even though Irzh now has my ipod, and even though I walked in the rain...

Right now, I feel kind of peaceful.

I think this is what they call the "calm after the storm". (IMBENTO, haha.)

But seriously.

The Kyla I used to be would be rambling now. She would probably be saying (or typing) all the curses her dirty mouth has learned, and yet, surprisingly she's not doing all those things. I'M not rambling, nor cursing. I'm calm... and fighting.

The words, "MOVE FORWARD" (Laurzo, 2009) keep popping in my head.

Cry over it, deal with it, leave it behind, fight, then MOVE FORWARD.

To tell you honestly, this morning was one of my worst mornings EVER. I was crying here on my bed, feeling totally lost and extremely helpless. And the tears didn't stop as I left the apartment. In front of the LT, while "reviewing" and waiting for our prof to bring us the exam, the tears came again. It seemed like my tear ducts weren't satisfied by this morning's bedside crying session.

Then I felt crappier as the hours passed. The second exam came, and whatever, I know I did my best. "best"

So after everything, after the 2 exams, on my way home, while I was making my group message to send to my Hopiababes, I realized that it was such an immature thing to do.. To rant and rant on things they wouldn't be able to solve for me nor can I solve for myself. Shit happened and there's nothing more I could do about it.

What do people do when they shit on the toilet? They immediately flush it down, right? And that's exactly what I did just a few hours ago.. I flushed it down.

And then came the eerie silence of serenity.
The calm after the storm.

I'm moving forward.
I will fight.


===

Lil's sick today.
But Js made her proud,
pwede na yung panggamot. Haha.

CONGRATS JS.
I'm so proud of you, batch!

See you thursday, mama lil. :)

UP Student, what?

With the way I am now, I honestly don't think I'm worthy of being called a UP Student. I know that it's inappropriate for me to think this way, especially now that I'm having my kape sessions, but it's a thought that's been haunting me ever since I became a third year student. Hell, even before I became a second year student.

It sucks.

2 exams today.
One at 9:30am and another one at 1:45pm.

I'm not supposed to be taking the exam at 1:45pm, and yet I am. It isn't a good feeling when the only thing I can do now is say to myself, "Fight. Kaya pa." The words seem feeble, worthless even. It's like they're only flashing in my head because they're an automatic response to my situation. But in reality, there's really no determination, no drive, no whatsoever to make those words come true.

It hurts.
It hurts that this has to be this way.

Music

And now, look look!
'Di parin ako nagsasawa :)



AFK na'ko.
"Aral For Kyla"

Laboness.

t('.'t)
BANGS!

Goodbye. Ipod.

Tomorrow, at exactly 11:00am, Irzh will get my dear ipod from me. She's purchasing it for a cheap price of p2,000. Haaaaay.

Today, I did all the "lasts" things I usually do while listening to my ipod.

I rode the LRT, I walked from Tayuman LRT Station to P. Guevarra, I studied, I edited my documents, I texted, I ate ... ALL WHILE LISTENING TO MY IPOD.

WAAAAAAH.

I can't imagine myself without it.

'Tis a sad moment while I'm writing this right now as I listen to "Love=This" by The Script.




===

:'s
SANA MAGREPLY NA SILA.

..and..

I AM SO DEAD.
SO DEAD, I AM.

Wide awake.

I texted them already even though I am still here editing my jipeohay. Haay. I wonder what's taking them so long to reply... Maybe the way I texted was wrong or maybe.. I don't know. One thing's for sure though,
everything starts today.


===

It's a wonder how I'm as awake as an owl right now. Claud and Vna left an hour ago. They still have exams and reports to prepare for. Wawa. Actually, I also have two upcoming exams.

But.. but.. but.. I think my jipeohay still needs a few bleeps here and there.

Anyways.
Last night was our very first sleepless night. Literally. We really had zero sleep.

We were only able to steal a few precious minutes of sleep this morning.

For the tallying.. Here goes:

White Choco - 7:30 to 8:00am
Mocha - 8:30 to 9:00am
Cara - 9:30 to 10:00am
Vanilla - Don't know. She went back to her dorm at 5:30am

And yes, we use our codenames. Haha.
You may ask why did we use coffee flavors for our codenames?
Well, it's all because of this line...

"Nakakaantok magkape."

There's more to that line than you can read and I'm not telling. Hihi.

Bye now.

PS: This post may appear to be happy or perky or stable or normal but I'm really just freaking out right now. But all's gonna be well, I know and I hope! VI FASITIV.


===

Miss ko na.


*edited by Bianx

EDITING.

Pwedeng kabahan?


♥Cara

Morning PANIC.

Already broken, already gone
Already know you're moving on,
I'm a breathing, talking, dead man walking..

I AM DEFINITELY A DEAD (WO)MAN WALKING.

I haven't finished my paperworks and today's the day that we've (KAPE girls) set to send all of our paperwoks to ALL! Shitz. I'm so dead. Double dead. Triple dead. DEAD IN THE TRUEST SENSE OF THE WORD (okay, not really. haha.)

It's just that I don't have any other time but NOW to finish this (and yet I'm here updating my blog. wth.) I have so many things scheduled for today. I have Mr. Sn Migel's FR later, then there's the GA, and then immediately after that, Js, Aidl and I will go straight to San Mateo to visit Sndy's lolo's wake. HAAAAAY. BUSY, BUSY, BUSY. So many things to do. Arrrgh.

THIS IS ALL MY FAULT. I wasted so much time yesterday (and the days before that). EFF.


===

I'm worried for Bianx, Mrg and Mza.
Will expound on this some other time.



.....if the truth is you're a liar
when you say that you're okay.

Goin' Crazy - Natalie

"I gotta let you know I think that we are destiny
For you I'd cross the world,
for you I'd do anything.."

I can not believe that I forgot about this song! And it's totally unacceptable that it's not on my current playlist! This song is THE song. Grabe.

THIS WAS THE SONG THAT KEPT ME ALIVE DURING MY HEARTBREAK DAYS. Haha. SERIOUSLY. It brings back so much memories.

It makes me laugh 'cause I used to put this song on repeat FOR DAYS. This song was my heartbreak theme song. It totally was! I used to listen to it while making my heartbreak poems on my heartbreak diary, shedding some heartbreak tears, in my heartbreak bed, during the wee hours of my heartbreak mornings! I MEAN, SERIOUSLY.

THIS WAS THE SONG. MY SONG. THE SONG OF THE STORY OF MY LIFE... then.

Asa States pa'ko nito pare. AHAHAHA. Wala lang.
Those were the days :)


LOOK AT MY BEAUTIFUL PLAYLIST. Hihi.



Actually, ang dapat niyong pansinin diyan ay yung number of plays
nung mga kanta ng The Script.

♥ LOVE.


===

"FIERCE" ANG PROFILE PIC KO.
OHA.



At kung nagtataka kayo kung pano ko na-access yung Facebook profile ko, well, ginamit ko Facebook ni Mrg. Haha. Ako yung nagiba ng password niya, so may Facebook access parin ako, kay Mrg nga lang yung nagagamit ko. Haha.

Limang oras.

Kakauwi ko lang.

Halos limang oras din ang nasayang kong oras kanina sa Rob... Pero okay lang kasi kasama ko naman sila Bahm, Mza, Vna, Claud, at Js. Hihi.

Masaya kaming nagsayang ng oras sa Rob. Kulitan at kwentuhan to the max ang naganap kanina. Ang hyper nga ni Js eh. AS IN. May something sa kanya sa araw na 'to. Siguro dahil manonood siya ng The L Word mamaya, season 3 at naeexcite siya. Inggit ako. Waah. Buti pa siya. Haay. Ohwell.

Narealize ko rin pala today kung gano namin ni Js kakilala ang isa't isa. Napagtanto ko rin kung gano ako kaswerte na may kaibigan (at sis) akong katulod niya. YESSSS. Haha. Buti nalang hindi niya nababasa 'tong blog ko. Haha.

Nag-sorry siya kanina. Randomly lang. As in biglaan lang niyang sinabi na "sorry". Para ngang hindi niya pinlanong sabihin yun sa moment na yun eh, pero parang tama lang yung timing.. Nung una diko talaga naintindihan kung bakit, pero nung pangalawang beses na niyang sinabi na "sorry", naintindihan ko na agad. Ewan. Natouch ako.


===

SHET. Kinikilig na naman ako.
HAY NAKO. HAY NAKO.

Gusto ko na tuloy mag-Facebook! Si Js kasi eh, sinabi pa yun sa'kin. WAH. Namaaan. Haay. Andun pa yung effort na pumunta sa wall ko at ayun. Basta. SHAAAAAXXX. FACEBOOK.

(Good) Morning!

"Good" nga ba ang umaga ko?
Parang hindi..

Kasi naman, paggising ko, problema agad bumungad sa'kin, 5AM yun ah. ALAS SINGKO NG UMAGA. Pagkaaga-aga at si Mr. Problema agad ang sumalubong sa'kin. Edi okay fine, deal with it.

Pero hindi pa yun dun nagtapos, pagtingin ko naman sa cellphone ko, problema ulit. Pagtingin ko sa Kape Blog, problema ulit. Hindi na ba natapos?

Bawat segundo na pumapatak sa araw na 'to, lalong dumadagdag ang kelangang isipin at alalahanin..

Ang bigat ng nakalagay sa balikat namin. Alam ko, at unti-unti ko naring natatanggap na pagkatapos ng pag-inom namin ng kape, eh mas malaking bagahe pa ang aming dadalhin. Hindi ko alam kung kaya namin yun, may pagdadalawang-isip na nagaganap pero alam kong kakayanin namin 'to, KELANGANG KAYANIN.

Buti naman at isa na lang klase ko today, 10-12nn, Chem 150 make up class. Alam ko dapat wala nang klase today, dapat buong araw akong kape session, pero epal si Chem 150 eh. :|

Tapos nawawala na yung effect ni Acceptance (the band!) sa'kin. :'( Buti nalang at andyan pa ang The Script at ang mga nakakapaglubag loob nilang kanta. Pero alam niyo ba, namamatay na'ko. AS IN. Kasi sa Oct 11, bibilhin na sa'kin ni Irizh yung ipod ko. NALULUNGKOT TALAGA AKO KASI IBIG SABIHIN, WALA NA'KONG MAPAPAKINGGAN. :'( Kaya ko ba yun? Kung hindi ko lang misyon ang "sell your possessions", hindi ko naman 'to gagawin eh.. Atleast ibig sabihin, pwede ko nang sabihin na apat nalang misyon ko kasi nagawa ko na yun isa.

Wala naman kasi akong problema sa pera. Alam ko kasing kakailanganin ko ang pera sa buong kape session, kaya naman medyo nagipon nako. May konti pakong savings kuno dun sa aking mini piggy bank. Pero sana madagdagan pa yung pera ko. Haay. Si Mke kasi eh, 'dipa niya nababayaran yung utang niya sa'kin. 3K din yun! At nung first year pa kami nun.. Tuwing tinetext ko siya, 'di naman siya nagrereply. :'(

Sana maging tunay na "good" na talaga ang umaga ko.
Pakita ka naman diyan, crush!
Text ko kaya ;) Hihi.

NOW PLAYING: Science and Faith, The Script.

Acceptance is back!

ACCEPTANCE = as in the band!

If you're an avid follower of my blog, you would probably know that I'm a fan of Acceptance (the band!)

Since I lost my other ipod, I have completely forgotten my love for this band. And now that I remembered that I love them, I immediately downloaded their albums! Yes, their FOUR albums..

Blacklines to Battlefield
Phantoms
Undone
Lost for Words

This band and I go waaaaaay back to second year (I think, I'm not sure). I remember that I used to listen to them in my discman (na buhay pa hanggang ngayon, hihi.) and I would secretly bring that discman to school (it wasn't allowed for students to bring any kind of gadget to school kasi) so that I'd be able to listen to them on my bus ride home. Haha. The music-lover in me...

Right now, at this moment, their song Hold On is playing on my ipod. Teehee. I extremely missed their sound ♥ To bad that they disbanded already :'(

Can you believe that I was starting to get tired of The Script (just a liiiitle ittle bit), but then I guess now that wouldn't happen.

Why?

'Cause I put Acceptance and The Script in one playlist (plus Safetysuit) and WOOOW, EARGASM TO THE MAX, PARE!

NO MORE WRITER'S BLOCK.
YEY.

I'm inspired once again!

I'm So Weak

I haven't stared in front of the computer's screen this long in a while. The last time I did was probably when I was doing a (or copying someone else's) labreport back in first year.

I'm staring because I'm having a hard time putting everything in my mind into words. I feel like I'm not thinking the right things and it pushes me to examine myself, my intentions and my goals. I feel like I know what I want, but I'm afraid that it isn't enough. I'm afraid that it's not yet time. I'm afraid that things wouldn't fit. I'm afraid that I wouldn't be able to deliver.

It's hard to start from scratch. Maybe that's the reason why they all say, the first step is always the hardest, because right now I'm still in the process of inching my way towards that vital first step..

WHAT TO DO, WHAT TO DO.
I feel weak.

I am weak.

I hate this writer's block. :|

Kape Girls. Hihi.

Cara
Mocha
Vanilla
White Choco


===


And the questions persists...

"Do you think ..... with those papers?"

KYLA IS BOTHERED. BOTHERED. BOTHERED.

But anyways..
I'll deal with that later when I get back home.
For now, OFF TO CP!
PhCh25 4th exam, here I go!

AY10-11 (2nd Sem), The Script ♥

PWEDENG MAMATAY?
PWEDE BA YUN?



Shit.
Kaya ko ba 'to?
Hindi ko alam.

Tinitignan ko palang,
parang nawawalan nako ng hininga.


===

For The First Time by The Script



♥

Sessions

KAPE.





Goodbye for now..

The Start: Stirring

HULING MATINONG TULOG.

Goodnight.


===

Nafufrustrate ako!
DI'KO AGAD NAKIKITA POSTS MO SA FACEBOOK.
KELANGAN KO PANG PUNTAHAN WALL MO!


WAAAAH.

Kilig parin ♥

♥♥♥

You won't find faith or hope down a telescope
You won't find heart and soul in the stars
You can break everything, down to chemicals
But you can't explain a love like ours.


Tama na please?
Sana matapos na 'tong never-ending kilig na 'to.
May exam pako bukas!


===

If your standing with your suitcase
But you can't step on the train
Everythings the way that you left it I still haven't slept yet

And if your covering your face now
But you just can't hide the pain
Still setting two plates on the counter but eating without

If the truth is your a liar
Then just say that your okay
I'm sleepin on your side of the bed goin out of my head now

And if your out there tryina move on
But somethin pulls you back again
I'm sitting here tryina persuade you like your in the same room

And I wish you could give me the cold shoulder
And I wish you could still give me a hard time
And I wish I could still wish it was over
But even if wishing is a waste of time
Even if I never cross your mind

I'll leave the door on the latch
If you ever come back if you ever come back
They'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back
They'll be a smile on my face and the kettle on
And it will be just like you were never gone
They'll be a light in the hall and the key under the mat
If you ever come back if you ever come back now
Oh if you ever come back if you ever come back

Now they say I'm wasting my time
Cause your never commin home
But they used to say the world was flat but how wrong was tht now

And by leaving my door open
I'm risking everything I own
There's nothing I can lose in a breakin that you haven't taken

If it's the fighting you remember or the little things you miss
I know your out there somewhere so just remember this
If it's the fighting you remember or the little things you miss
Oh just remember this oh just remmeber this

If You Ever Come Back
The Script ♥

Ethn Zchary Go

...'Cause you're long gone and moved on.

It's such a sad way to end our anniv month and even a sadder way to start the month of October.

He is just a small creature with no tinge of malice in his mind nor heart. It's so tragic I can't even imagine what Oswld or his wife is feeling right now.


Rest in God's love, Ethn.
Now you're gone, you can move on.

Js, Bianx and I will go to the wake on Monday. I wish I could go with my others sisses and brods today, but I just can't because of the stupid 95 exam and practicals. And I also can't go tomorrow because of the 25 practicals and of our 95 movie shooting. Haaaaay. :'(

SADNESS.
GRIEF.

It's just not right.

===

Bianx: eh kasiiiiiiiii, kahapon i was super happy, kasi diba galing ako kela kevin, bonding kaming tatlo. then biglang pag dating ko bahay, nakita ko na lahaaat ng msg.s parang effers talaga. kasi blood type O ako, and i volunteered to go tuesday, pero sabi ni lalay no need dibuh. parang, i can help, pero i didn't.