I'm sorry.

I'm sorry but you're really hurting me.

They say that the people you trust the most are the ones who are most capable of hurting the shit out of you. Lovelife-wise, I've experienced this many times before and I can definitely attest to it. Frienship-wise, I must say, I've had no such experience yet... not until now.

Frankly, I know I should be handling this much better, but I guess its highly personal now, like i'm-writing-on-my-diary-crying-tiny-tears kind of personal.

At my LRT ride home awhile ago, I retold our story in my head. We were such kids then, kinda immature, virtually adventurous and true to life happy go lucky people. But even so, and I never told you this, I didn't see you as a lost kid. I respected all your principles, thoughts, ideas and beliefs. I looked up to you even. You're way of thinking was different from mine and I wanted to think like the way you do. Which, now when I trace every decision I've made, I think is the reason why I'm here in this position.

I'm standing here, trying to keep shit in order, making ends meet and keeping things life moving forward.

The difference is... you're not. You turned away from me. And it's not like you did this honorable abandonment that honestly, I would've accepted better. Instead, you chose to be sudden. As if we were in the middle of a conversation and you suddenly just hurried off 'cause you heard the ice cream truck coming (ice cream truck not part of the metaphor you guys).

And that? Just ouch.

Another is... back then, I never saw this in our future. I thought we'd be here together. Supporting each other. Oh god, of all the people, just of all the people, why you? What's going on inside your head? You know you can always just tell me, explain to me what's happening. But you didn't.

Both of us turned the blind eye and simple went with the waves. Partly, I know I'm also at fault here. I did my best to understand you, to give you some leeway. Can't you give me just the respect? Respect for the long history that we have?

I'm sorry but I'm about to give up. Hanging by a thread here.

True. Because I just can't handle this. It's not like I'm standing on the strongest tripod here. Do I still need to elaborate this? I'm just so tired.

I'm sorry but I love Glee and Westlife.

Finally. Something good to be sorry for.

And yes, I'm seeing Westlife live here in Manila on September 29! I am beyond freaking excited. ARANETA, WELCOME ME WITH OPEN ARMS! I'm going with Vi-ann. Just. Can't. Wait. Any. Longer.

For Glee though, I know they will never drop by our 3rd world country anytime soon, probably never. But I'm still hoping. Just give me that tiny sliver of hope. I really just wanna see Naya... and this leads us to...

I'm sorry but Naya is killing me.


Crappy picture is perfect.